Self Care in Action

Self-Care in Action:

Self care is not a linear practice but one that has many avenues and facets.  It can be personal restorative practices, developing important leadership skills, or action based activities.  Self-care should not solely be focused on one thing but a life long practice that meets a variety of needs, wants, and values.  Making it only a restorative practice can leave a gap in other areas of our life needing attention.  The following post will discuss why self-care in action is an important part of everyone self care practices throughout their life span. 

Self-Care is Action:

Another healthy component of self care beyond restorative practices is action based. A restorative practice can help us feel better and more centered when we are feeling burned out, overtaxed or overextended and it works effectively for many needs, but when we become upset or see things as being unfair, it might not be the best tool.  Sometimes action is needed when you are pissed off, fed up or just plain enraged about injustice, unfair systems or corrupt practices. 

Action and Our Nervous System:

When we become upset, stressed or activated by an event or experience, we mobilize energy inside our body that helps move us towards action. This action can range from a need to fix something, correct something, and in extreme situations, it will activate our fight or flight system.  This can happen when we feel unsafe. The brain often doesn’t know the difference so it will mobilize energy to act, run, fight or even freeze.  When this energy is not expelled, we can find it get stuck inside us and show up in other ways.  This energy can turn inward towards depression, or outward in the form of anxiety.  Anxiety and depression can be masked in so many ways; eating, drinking, substances, shopping or general discontent. 

Its a Good Thing To Get Pissed Off:

It is a good thing when we get bothered, upset or angry about events or experiences that violate our values, beliefs or disrupts the relationships we have with others.  Becoming angry is not a negative thing; it is an experience like any most people have during any given day. It can be problematic when the ways in which this anger is express are damaging or harmful or even when we fail to express anger in general, healthy ways.  Anger can also be a secondary emotion for feelings of disconnection, doubt, vulnerability, or even fear when we see our own experiences mirrored others.   It can be a mirror to our own internal world when we see someone’s values, morals or beliefs being violated, ignored or dismissed. It can also mirror prior painful experiences creating a sense of déjà vu. 

We are Wired for Connection:

As humans, we are wired for connection and when we see others in pain or suffering, it compels us into action as a way to elevate the suffering.  We do this for the greater good of our shared humanity ore even as a way we soothe ourselves.  Seeing suffering in others, we can also know this is an experience we could have too.  This suffering also reverberates throughout the world in many different ways; pain, hurt, anger, and other human violations that people do against others.  These experiences break the connection we see with others and break the connection within ourselves; when we act in ways that are hurtful, we hurt our own humanity and those of the our neighbors; both locally and nationally. 

Action can be reparative. 

Action also rectifies a sense of fairness and balance within the world.  Action can be a forward motion that can be small or large.  It can be writing letters, calling our elected representatives, protesting/marching, running for office or getting involved in non-profit or policy work.  It can mobilize our energy and strong emotions to productive action that can create change.  This change, while it often takes the form of small steps, can be a way to rebalance and restore problematic systems that disenfranchise the oppressed and marginalized.  Instead of directing the anger, hurt and pain towards the harm of others, being action based to channel these experiences in a more productive and healthy way can be a healthy and restorative practice. 

When we move action towards progress, we engage in a healthier and productive manner.  It moves the excess energy through our nervous systems in a way that avoids it from being stuck or trapped.  It also adds a voice or resources to those in our community who have been historically marginalized or excluded from having input into the community.  It helps to soothe our own pain and helplessness.  Finally is cements a greater connection to ourselves, our neighbors and larger community.  When we can see the connection to ourselves through others, we create an environment where everyone thrives within the best versions of themselves and feeling worst versions of themselves accepted in a loving way.  When everyone is doing well, this is self-care.